You Can't Find Something That Isn't Lost.
Unpopular opinion: I have been struggling for the last few years to "find myself" as I'm sure a lot of you have. Shit, some people are making millions of dollars on the idea that women need to figure out who they are and they sell books and courses and journals and have podcasts to prove their point. Bully for them!
Here's what I know right now as I'm sitting in my quiet family room, drinking coffee and thinking about my life while everyone is sleeping.
I don't need to find myself.
I started thinking about this when my grandma died a month ago and I wondered if she ever thought about what her life was supposed to be. If she ever worried she wasn't doing what she was meant to do.
I soon realized how silly that was. She never had a moment to think that maybe there was more to life because she was actually living her life! She also didn't have an entire industry telling her there was 'more'.
She didn't have the internet telling her she wasn't pretty enough, blonde enough, skinny enough, eyebrows thick enough or whatever other bullshit we are told on the daily. Not mom enough if she didn't nurse and use cloth diapers, feeding only organic food, while driving the biggest SUV on the planet.
No, she just got up every morning, got her kids ready for school, and then went to work doing her daily tasks or jobs. Taking care of her household and family.
While I was thinking there must be more to life than just being a wife and mom I was taking something away from my family.
Their wife and mom.
I am here for THEM. Yes, I love my business and my friends and no I don't have to be everything for everybody.
My purpose in life is to be Joel's wife and the mom to our two beautiful kids. And to just be freaking happy with what we have.
I don't have to look for more than that. And neither do you. You don't have to be more. You just have to be you. Be happy where you're planted. Strive to be the best you - but be happy in the journey.
Life is too fricken short to be anything but happy.
And honestly, it's not that hard if you start with a thankful heart. I'm thankful I have been given these people to care for. Be thankful. Be of service to others. That's the true way to "find" yourself.
And that's where I "found myself". Turns out, I wasn't lost, after all.